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Sparrow House shelters moms-to-be

When Deacon Jeff McFillin first saw Sparrow House, “I was taken back,” he admits.

The young deacon hadn’t expected that a home for girls in crisis pregnancies would be as large or as pleasant as the modern, 2 ½ story, 5-bedroom Colonial in residential Bel Air.

But then, he says, “I thought to myself, this is the way God wants the girls to be treated!”

Deacon McFillin and his wife Laura have been house parents for two years at Sparrow House.

There, girls whose world has suddenly turned scary and uncertain find themselves surrounded by a judicious mix of love, faith, structure, and hands-on help.

Since it began in 1985, Sparrow House has sheltered and cared for 155 young, pregnant women in need of help

The home, which presently houses three girls, is allowed up to four under zoning regulations.  The girls, whose average age is 14 to 15, usually come in their fourth or fifth month of pregnancy and stay until their baby is born.

House Mom Laura oversees the girls’ daily routines.

At breakfast we do morning devotions,” she says.  “Then some girls will do home schooling, or they have a part-time job.

“They have lots of classes:  adoption and parenting, menu planning, relationships class, manners class, nutrition class, and money management class.  We’re about to start job readiness.”

Laura teaches parenting – “basic infant care,” she explains – “making baby bottles and bathing babies, using dolls.  I also have a session on playing and bonding.”

Part of their parenting class is “Bootie Camp,” a 10-day stint in which each girl carries around a life-like, computer-programmed baby doll that cries on schedule.

“It’ll register if the girl doesn’t respond when it cries or needs feeding,” says Laura.

The girls see what life with young children is like for real via the McFillin’s sons, Jimmy, 2, and Stephen, 3 ½.

“They get to see what it’s like to go grocery shopping with two little kids,” says Laura with a wry smile.

Counselor Kim Rogers meets weekly with each girl for 45 minutes of individual counseling.

“We talk about issues in their families and what they’re doing with their life,” she says.

In addition, Kim conducts counseling sessions with each girl’s family.

“Usually, there are a lot of family troubles, hurt and pain,” says Kim.  “We try to smooth out those issues.

“First and foremost, we talk about what’s going to happen to her and the baby – whether she can move back with the family after the baby is born.”

Kim also conducts weekly group sessions on adoption.

“We watch short videos on adoption and talk about the pros and cons.  A lot of the girls have negative concepts about it.  I explain that they can choose open adoption, and decide how much contact they want to have with their child.”

The home works with Bethany Christian and Catholic Charities adoption services.

On average, 70 percent of the girls decide to parent their child, and 30 percent place their child for adoption, says Sparrow House Director Karen Kish.

“It used to be higher for adoption, but adoption has taken a bad rap in the last few years,” she explains.

“We take a neutral position.  We give them all the information, and they decide what they want to do.”

A labor and delivery nurse from a nearby hospital comes to the home to teach childbirth classes.

Two labor coaches, part of a cadre of 35 Sparrow House volunteers, are assigned to each girl.  They will accompany their girl through her labor and delivery.

Other volunteers teach the girls crafts such as scrapbooking and needlework. Still others drive them places, take them out for lunch, dinner or a movie, or invite them to their house for a weekend.

All the volunteers must be professed Christians and have a recommendation from their pastor.

The girls go with Deacon Jeff to Sunday services at the Church of Reconciliation. On Tuesday nights a volunteer conducts a teen Bible study class.  And Kim takes the girls to Straight Forward, a Catholic young adults group in Bel Air.

Financial support for Sparrow House comes from individuals, churches and businesses, says Karen;  “We take no federal funds.”

Sparrow House began 21 years ago in a sprawling old frame house in Owings Mills.  It moved to a converted Jarrettsville farmhouse in 1999.

Its present home in Bel Air, which it moved to in 2004, was provided by Michael and Steven Peroutka through the Elizabeth Streb Peroutka Foundation.